


stuck on you

by queenascendant



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, alternate universe - street racing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:03:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21517915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenascendant/pseuds/queenascendant
Summary: Mark's best friend Yukhei is a street racer. Mark is no racer himself, but he is a good friend. When he agrees to help Yukhei in an ill-advised scheme, he gets more than he bargained for in the form of Yukhei's so-called rival, a street racer named Jungwoo.
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Wong Kun Hang | Hendery/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Kim Jungwoo/Mark Lee (NCT)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 93
Collections: NCT Rarepair





	stuck on you

**Author's Note:**

> written for prompt #155!
> 
> this is actually my first fic ever, and it ran away from me a bit. i didn't get as much into the street racing aspect as i hoped to, but i hope you'll still enjoy! the title is from red velvet’s ‘candy’ because i’ve been listening to it a lot lately and i’m terrible with titles...

It wasn’t hard for Mark to find the right booth. His friends always sat at the same one, close enough to the bar to harass Taeyong when he was behind it and far enough away that they didn’t get any drunken patrons stumbling into their table and spilling drinks. 

Mark was the last one there. Renjun, Jeno, and Jaemin were crowded into each other despite claiming an entire side of the booth, and Haechan and Yukhei sat on the other side, both talking animatedly with their hands. Renjun caught sight of Mark across the dimly lit bar and waved him over.

“Hey, guys,” Mark said as he slid in next to Yukhei, who threw an arm over his shoulder.

“Hey, bro, how’s it going?” Yukhei said. His welcoming grin seemed a bit distracted, and Mark frowned at him.

“You okay, man?”

Donghyuck snorted. “He’s fine. He’s just been regaling us with tales of his helpless, embarrassing crush non-stop for the last twenty minutes. You’re late, Mark Lee.”

Mark ignored the pointed remark and turned to Yukhei with a raised eyebrow. “Crush? Why is this the first I’m hearing of this? I’m your best friend!”

Yukhei groaned, raising a self-conscious hand to pat the back of his hair. “Listen, Donghyuck’s right, it  _ is _ embarrassing.”

Mark leaned into his space, grinning. “Yeah? It’s my right as your best friend to know everything embarrassing about you. So, who is it?”

“Yeah, seriously. You’ve been rambling for like half an hour and haven’t even dropped a name. You’re leaving us high and dry here, Yukhei,” Jaemin said from where he was tucked into Jeno’s shoulder.

“You haven’t even told them who you’re going on about? We’re all friends here, Yukhei, spill,” Mark insisted, slapping his thigh.

Yukhei attempted the dreaded puppy eyes, but Mark’s expectant grin was backed by everyone else at the table, so finally he caved with a long-suffering sigh.

“Okay, okay, fine. Just hush, okay? It's someone in the racing gang."

Yukhei was well known in the street racing crowd, having been a racer since he moved to town from Hong Kong a few years ago. He was the one who'd discovered Taeyong's bar in the first place -- a lot of the racers and their friends tended to hang out there. Though Yukhei's friends, Mark included, had nothing to do with street racing, Taeyong had long since given up trying to chase them out.

“Ooooh,” Renjun jumped in, smirking. “Is it that guy in the fancy black car who beats you every week? Did you finally see his face and fall in love?”

Yukhei made an offended noise. “No, I do not have a crush on my  _ sworn rival _ ! We’re enemies, I can’t believe you would even suggest that!”

Mark bit his lower lip to keep from giggling. For months now he’d been subject to Yukhei’s long rants on the ‘arrogant asshole’ in the sleek black car who managed to beat Yukhei by seconds nearly every week, the one who always wore a helmet everywhere he went.

“Well then, who is it?” Donghyuck demanded.

“Well it’s...well, you see…” Yukhei started stumbling over his words, ears growing red. He still seemed a bit offended they had suggested an illicit romance with his rival.

Mark let his thoughts wander as Yukhei kept stammering, growing increasingly flustered as the rest of the table joined in speculating on his crush’s identity. 

Yukhei was a speed demon at heart, and racing every weekend out on the outskirts of town was his Thing, capital T. He thought of the few times Yukhei had convinced him to show up for support at his races. He’d huddled in the cold with some of the guys from the garage Yukhei worked at, near the old picnic spot that usually marked the finish line of Yukhei’s street races. 

It was an unruly crowd despite the cold, a lot of drunken spectators milling around and the smell of gasoline and burning rubber in the air. He still had the little patch Kunhang, one of the mechanics at the garage, had sewn for him: a little cartoon of Yukhei’s obnoxious old blue-and-red sports car, duct-taped bumper included. 

When Kunhang had presented them to Yukhei after his race that night, he and Mark had laughed at his astonishment, his eyes open as wide as he could get them and his whole face flushing red.

As much as Yukhei loved street racing, Mark hadn’t been able to stop his worry for him every time he went. The usual street racing routes were all sharp corners, old country roads where deer could run across at any time. All of the out-of-the-way places where cops normally wouldn’t linger. 

Mark knew Yukhei was a skilled driver, but he had still been a bit terrified when Yukhei had nearly crashed head-on into another car right at the finish line the last time he’d attended. He’d been so worried that he’d dropped all his belongings, including his wallet and patched-over denim jacket, running towards the car to see if he was all right.

_ Wait _ , Mark thought. He skipped back in his imagining to the patch on his jacket that Kunhang, the mechanic, had made. Kunhang's white-faced fear that night, running right behind Mark to see if Yukhei was injured. The bashful grin Yukhei had given when Kunhang had started fussing over him, hunting down band-aids and giving his car a reassuring pat.

“It’s Kunhang, isn’t it?” Mark interjected, speaking over Jeno and Renjun, who had been getting increasingly close to a shout as they pressured Yukhei for the truth.

Yukhei gave an embarrassed little squeak, an adorable sound for someone who took up most of the booth just by himself. Mark knew he was right.

“Kunhang is cute! And he made all those little patches to support you, remember? What’s to be embarrassed about?” Mark asked, frowning at Yukhei’s still-red ears.

“Kunhang? From Kun’s garage?” Renjun said, eyes widening. “Doesn’t he have a boyfriend though?”

“Yes,” Yukhei whined, laying his head on the table dramatically and squishing his cheek into the wood. Mark winced. It couldn’t be sanitary, no matter how often Taeyong wiped the whole place down. “And that’s the problem!”

“What do you mean? I mean, yeah it sucks but we can work around it, maybe,” Donghyuck said, leaning back in his seat with a shrug. He yelped, and sent a glare across the table that made it clear Renjun had kicked him.

“Just because that worked with you and your demon boyfriend doesn’t mean Yukhei is capable of something that mean,” Renjun hissed.

Donghyuck rolled his eyes. “He’d already broken up with Dejun, asshole! And Yangyang isn’t a demon. If anything, I’m the demon.”

“We know,” said Jeno. 

“Anyway,” Mark said over their conversation, turning pointedly back to Yukhei’s slumped form. “What do you mean, Yukhei?”

Yukhei was silent for a few more moments, before he sat up slowly and gave Mark a distressed look. “It’s...not just Kunhang that I like. It’s... his boyfriend, too.”

“Oh,” said Mark. He wasn’t sure what to say. Yukhei looked despondent, frowning down at his half-empty beer glass.

“So not just Kunhang but Ten, too? Oh, you have it bad,” Renjun said softly, settling a hand over Yukhei’s.

“You never know what could happen,” Jeno said quietly, indicating Jaemin and Renjun on either side of him. “I mean, we worked out and we never thought we would.”

Jaemin gave him a tight squeeze, grinning. “You’re right, Jeno. I wouldn’t give up now, Yukhei.”

Yukhei seemed unconvinced. “Even if they’d be open to another boyfriend like you and Jeno were, they’re way out of my league. I don’t think Ten even knows my name. He just sees me around the garage sometimes. He’s always winning the races and I’m always behind that bastard in the black car.”

Mark patted his thigh, unsure of what to say.

“Hey, don’t worry about it so much, man,” he said. “Jeno’s right. You never know. And don’t put yourself down like that, you’re plenty cool! And even if Ten doesn’t know you very well, you’re really tight with Kunhang. Anything could happen.”

Yukhei sighed. “I guess you’re right. Damn, I didn’t mean to bring everyone’s mood down so much! I want you guys to have fun! I think I should go clear my head or something. Drive around a bit.”

Yukhei made to get up despite Mark’s protestations, easily moving his much smaller body out of the way and waving goodbye. Mark frowned after him, watching the still-slumped set of his shoulders. Yukhei was more upset than he was letting on, and Mark resolved to reach out to him later.

The group sat in silence, looking around awkwardly at Yukhei’s sudden departure. Jaemin launched into a new, unrelated conversation, looking determined to salvage the night, and Mark drifted into his thoughts again.

He was brought back into the moment when Donghyuck slammed his fist down on the table.

He just barely caught his rapidly tilting beer glass, splashing warm liquid all down one of his sleeves. He hissed in annoyance, righting the glass and leveling a glare at Donghyuck.

Donghyuck didn’t seem to notice.

“I have the solution,” he announced, and then stopped there. He eyed the rest of the table with expectant eyes.

They sat in silence for a good thirty seconds. Finally, Renjun let out an exasperated sigh and said, “Okay, god, fine, continue. What solution?”

“What do you mean, what solution? It’s for Yukhei.”

“I wasn’t aware Yukhei was a problem,” Jeno said, leaning over Jaemin to hand Mark his napkin. Mark thanked him quietly and started mopping up the spilled beer.

“Don’t be dense, Jeno,” Donghyuck said. “I’m talking about the solution for his sad love life.”

Mark snorted, dropping the napkin on the table. “So you’re gonna hook him up with Kunhang and Ten? How?”

Donghyuck leaned forward with that terrible grin that showed all his teeth, the one he got when he was planning something evil. Mark had seen it far too many times. “I’m getting him a date so I don’t have to listen to him whine anymore.”

“Kunhang and Ten are already dating each other, though,” Mark said. “How are you gonna get past that?”

“I don’t need to. I made it work with these three,” Donghyuck waved across the table, “and I can make it work with Yukhei and his soon-to-be racer boyfriends.”

“You didn’t get us together! I did!” Jaemin insisted. “I did that!”

Donghyuck waved him off. “You did it with my advice, though.”

“Your advice sucked!”

Mark sighed, tempted to slump down over the table like Yukhei had.

“Okay, just tell us what your terrible plan is already,” he groaned.

“My plan? Well, my plan is…” Donghyuck trailed off, raising a hand to stroke his jaw contemplatively. Renjun made to leap across the table and grab for his throat, but Jeno held him back.

“Okay, okay, since you’re all quivering with anticipation --” 

“We’re not actually, you’re just dragging it out,” Mark said, rolling his eyes.

“ _ Anyway _ , my plan is simple,” Donghyuck bulldozed over him. “Yukhei just has to make them jealous. And he’s going to use  _ you _ to do it,” he finished, turning to smirk directly at Mark.

Mark’s mouth fell open. “Me? Why me?”

“It has to be you. You’re the only one who goes to those races of his, so you’re the only one they might know. Also, you’re the only one in this group other than Yukhei who’s pathetically single.”

“Hey!”

“Well, it’s true. All you have to do is pose as Yukhei’s boyfriend for a couple races and if either Kunhang or Ten get upset about it, he’ll know his interest is returned.”

Donghyuck looked very self satisfied.

Mark groaned, dragging himself up from the booth. He’d had enough for one night.

“That is a stupid idea,” he said, pointing aggressively at Donghyuck’s smirking face to emphasize his point. “And I’m not doing it.”

Mark sank into his bed with a groan, reaching behind him to haul the bunched up blankets over his shoulders without lifting his head from the pillow. His friends had seemed content to talk well into the night, ordering drink after drink and even mentioning a possible club outing, but Mark had only lasted an hour and a half after Yukhei had left to collect his thoughts and never returned. 

Exhaustion dragged on his limbs. Every step on the walk back home had weighed twenty pounds. He’d stopped in at a convenience store under the pretence of buying an energy drink, knowing he shouldn’t give into the temptation of sleep, and had instead stood in front of the ice cream cooler basking in the chill for ten minutes before buying a sandwich and leaving. 

Even the sight of his laptop, dark and quiet as it was on his desk, sent anxiety shooting down his stomach and through the backs of his legs, and he’d stood in the dark with his backpack on for a few moments before dropping it. 

“Fuck it,” he’d sighed to himself, pushing away the disappointment at his own lack of motivation. And then he’d faceplanted into bed.

Projects and essays had been piling up for weeks now, but Mark had been so exhausted and out of it that the panic of upcoming deadlines had hidden behind a thick cloud of stress-induced apathy until they were right on top of him.

It was a constant cycle of screwing around on the internet, or playing video games, or going out with his friends with the anxiety of unfinished work crashing down on him like a wave at unexpected moments before abruptly retreating and then sitting in front of his blank-screened computer with no time left, anxiety finally full-force and inescapable and still nothing done.

Mark couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He loved what he was studying. He lived and breathed music, but these days he couldn't even work up enough motivation to do it for fun. The days when he would sit up late at night strumming on his guitar and slowly working through lyrics for songs he wasn't even assigned to write, songs he wanted to write just for the hell of it, were long gone.

Who was he, if he couldn't even bring himself to like the one thing he was good at? What was he good for, if not this?

His phone, abandoned on his nightstand, chimed sharply in the silence. Mark reached blindly for it from his blanket nest and switched it on, wincing at the brightness. It was Yukhei.

_ hey i talked to donghyuck ⌧⌧⌧ _

Mark rolled his eyes. Yukhei refused to stop spamming him with emojis even though he knew damn well Mark’s old Android phone couldn’t load them.

_ i’m guessing he told you about his stupid plan _

_ but what if it works??? come ooooon dude i’m desperate ⌧⌧ _

Well, at least Donghyuck had managed to cheer Yukhei up a bit. 

_ i’m not pretending to be your boyfriend to get you a date man _

_ ⌧⌧⌧⌧ _

_ i’m guessing those are all sad faces and they’re not changing my mind _

_ ⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧ _

_ oh my god ok i will THINK about it if you stop spamming me _

_ ur the best bro ⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧ _

_ that wasn’t a YES _

_ ⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧⌧ _

“I can’t believe you talked me into this,” Mark groaned, tempted to kick his feet up on Yukhei’s dashboard but too worried something would break off if he did. Yukhei’s car had probably been something impressive twenty years ago when his mother had driven it, but these days it was a Frankenstein’s monster of spare car parts and duct-tape. It was also painted in alternating stripes of blue and red, making it probably the most obnoxious car in all of street racing in Mark’s humble opinion.

And it was  _ hot _ . The leather of the seats stuck to the backs of Mark’s thighs even through his jeans. He was tempted to roll the window down and stick his head out like a dog, but Yukhei was stopped at a red light and the heavy summer air wouldn’t be much of a relief.

“Why don’t you have air-conditioning,” Mark whined, lifting his legs up to unstick them and stealing Yukhei’s (disgustingly warm) water bottle from the center console to take a sip.

“She’s a racing car, not a luxury vehicle,” Yukhei answered, slapping the wheel like he was giving it a reassuring pat. He had to shout over the radio blasting, but Yukhei was usually shouting anyway. “Anything unnecessary only slows us down!”

“I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’ve seen you drive, I must have a death wish.”

“Oh, come on! I’ve won many races in my time! Which hasn’t ended yet, obviously. We’re totally gonna win tonight, whether that asshole in the helmet shows up or not.”

Mark contemplated unlocking the passenger-side window and jumping out, but just as he made a tentative grab for the door handle the light turned green and Yukhei took off with a disconcerting screech of brakes. He latched onto the handle above the window instead, white-knuckling it.

“Your car is a zombie of other dead car parts and rubber bands and it is going to kill us both.” Mark hissed through gritted teeth, tensing his thighs up so he wouldn’t slide into the door as Yukhei tore through a sharp turn without slowing.

Yukhei pouted without taking his eyes off the road. Mark gave him one, singular Good Driver Point (most likely the only one he’d get, with that lead foot of his), and refused to loosen his grip on the grab handle. 

“She’s not gonna kill us, dude. You’ll see. She’s given me at least third place every weekend for the last two months! And tonight we’re taking first.”

“Eyes on the prize, Yukhei. I’m not sitting in this death trap to watch you win your race, dude.”

“Oh. Yeah,” Yukhei said sheepishly. His ears went a little red. “And Ten and Kunhang are totally gonna be jealous when I turn up with you in my passenger seat and then they’ll pull me aside after I win and confess their undying love and we’ll be together forever.”

He seemed a bit out of breath after vomiting out the supportive speech Jaemin had given him earlier that night, but at least he remembered it.

“That’s the spirit, buddy,” Mark said with a fond pat to Yukhei’s shoulder, struggling not to giggle. As much as Mark hated being roped into this dumbass plan, he was rooting for Yukhei. 

Mark still didn’t know much about either of them, but he supposed he could see the appeal. Kunhang, with the big brown eyes and adorable oversized sweaters, always stained at the collar and sleeves with oil or grease. He’d been friendly when Mark went to the races, offering to let Mark sit next to him and keeping conversation alive when Mark was too shy to approach the intimidating racers. He’d gotten to know Yukhei when he still wore white t-shirts and basketball shorts every day, and his racer uniform of sleek leather and excess silver jewelry didn’t phase him the way it did on the others.

Ten was one of those intimidating racers, with some sort of sleek, vaguely alien-looking silver sports car that Mark didn’t know the name of. Brand of? Mark didn’t know how to talk about cars. Usually he tuned Yukhei out when he got started. Ten communicated mostly through flirty grins that showed all his teeth and sarcastic remarks, and Mark was a bit worried he’d eat Yukhei alive if his best friend succeeded in gaining his attention. 

Despite his misgivings, Mark had agreed to ride in Yukhei’s car during his race tonight, something Yukhei never let anyone else do. With every second of oppressive summer heat and growl of the engine Mark hated Donghyuck a little bit more.

The usual meet up spot for racers was the same bar Mark had spent last week arguing with his friends in. Mark still wasn’t sure what the bar’s owner, Taeyong, had to do with racing. He was a small, quiet man with a variety of bright hair colors and interesting piercings, and when he wasn’t behind the bar he was at a back table with a collection of the older racers on the scene.

Mark wondered, with a brief flare of guilt, if anyone who knew Kunhang or Ten had heard his friends loudly debating the best course of action for Yukhei’s crush. Despite Yukhei’s warning they’d gotten fairly loud. But it was too late to worry about that now.

Yukhei screeched to a stop in the bar’s grimy, dimly-lit parking lot and turned to grin at Mark.

“If nothing else, at least I can show you how racing is from inside the car.”

“You say that like it’s a good thing,” Mark complained, unsticking his legs from the leather seat and putting a hand on the door handle.

“It is! You’ll see,” Yukhei said, reaching over to put a hand on Mark’s thigh and keep him in. “I really think you’ll like it. Seriously, you spend so much time worrying about everything I think just living in the moment might be good for you.”

Mark laughed nervously. “Wow, harsh, man,” he said weakly, tightening his hand on the door handle. Yukhei frowned at him.

“Is everything okay with you? I know we haven’t talked about much besides my whole crush thing lately but you seem even more tired than usual? You know I’m always here for you, Mark.”

Oh no. He was breaking out Mark’s actual name, which meant he was actually concerned. Mark felt anxiety tighten in the pit of his stomach, and tried to breathe through it. He really hadn’t wanted to bring anything up on a night he was meant to be helping Yukhei.

“It’s nothing major, Yukhei. Just...the same stress I’m always under, you know? Constant work. Constant homework. Stress about the future. It’ll pass, I promise.”

Yukhei didn’t look convinced. “Okay, man. But if you need to talk about something I hope you’ll talk to me. I really appreciate you trying to help, I hope you know that.”

Mark desperately wanted to get out of the car. He laughed nervously, again, and put a hand over Yukhei’s without making eye contact.

“I get you, man. I will. And don’t worry, we’re getting you a date tonight! Even if I die in your terrifying, evil car!”

Yukhei snorted. “You’re not gonna die! You’re gonna have fun, I swear.”

The other drivers who usually hung around the bar were surprisingly welcoming, but Mark supposed part of it had to do with him clinging to Yukhei’s hand. He wasn’t sure how to go about posing as Yukhei’s boyfriend -- he had never been very affectionate in public, and the fact that they weren’t actually dating didn’t help. Fortunately, Yukhei was affectionate enough for the both of them, as he usually was with everyone.

Mark gave Taeyong an awkward wave, spotting him at the outer edge of the parking lot. Taeyong waved back, leaning in to the very tall man next to him. The leather jacket he was wearing seemed to indicate he was a racer, too, but Mark could hardly tell anyone apart. It was so dark already he wouldn’t have been able to pick out Yukhei’s car from a line-up, and he felt like a bit of a fraud. What kind of racer’s boyfriend knew absolutely nothing about cars?

He vaguely recognized some of the others, like the short Japanese man with the ponytail who sometimes helped Taeyong out behind the bar when he was busy. He was leaning against an expensive-looking white and red motorcycle. Mark shuddered at the thought of riding something so small and open through sharp turns, worried enough about Yukhei’s car surviving a collision with another car, or a tree, or hell, even a mailbox. The damn thing squeaked as if on ancient hinges when Yukhei jumped into it -- how did it survive racing every weekend?

He caught a brief glimpse of Ten, wearing a button down shirt open nearly to the stomach, talking animatedly with some of the guys from Yukhei’s garage. Kunhang was there too, his dark hair curly and framing his face, one hand absently resting on Ten’s shoulder. They were chatting with the garage’s owner, Yukhei’s boss Kun. Kun was newly blonde and looked serious, his arms crossed over his leather-clad chest despite the summer heat. Mark had only spoken to him a few times, but at the garage he was normally covered in grease stains and grinning at something stupid Yukhei had said.

Mark tried to be a bit more obvious about holding Yukhei’s hand, but neither of their targets looked their way. He saw Yukhei’s shoulders slump a bit from the corner of his eyes and knew Yukhei had seen it too. He sighed and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

The only racer he couldn’t seem to spot was Yukhei’s rival, the one who always wore a black helmet. Mark had never seen his face, only his fancy black car as he sped past Yukhei (and usually everyone else) at the finish line. He’d never seen him inside Taeyong’s bar either.

Their only interaction had been a few months back, when Mark had had to get between the mysterious racer and Yukhei’s temper. His best friend was quick to anger, but even quicker to calm, so he’d backed off as soon as Mark had walked up to put a hand on his arm. Mark couldn’t even remember what he’d been so mad about, something about the race that had caused Yukhei to lose, but the helmeted driver had barely seemed to notice Yukhei attempting to tower over him. Surprisingly enough, the helmeted stranger had nearly been the same height as Yukhei, though much slimmer. He hadn’t moved or spoken, simply stood there as if waiting for Yukhei to get out of his way so he could get back to his car. Mark had been a little impressed despite himself.

“I’m gonna go grab a drink from the bar, okay? We have to wait until full dark anyway,” Yukhei said quietly in Mark’s ear. He leaned down right into Mark’s space, making the conversation seem much more intimate than it actually was. At least one of them was a good actor, though Mark could see across the parking lot that Ten had disappeared somewhere.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Sure. Everything all right, man?” Mark asked, giving his hand a squeeze. Now that he thought about it, Yukhei looked a little nervous, his eyes wide, the set of his shoulders high.

“Oh, yeah, dude, it’s okay. Honestly, I always get a little keyed up before a race, don’t worry about it. You want anything?”

“Nah, I’m good. Just don’t leave me here too long.”

That got a laugh out of Yukhei, and a hint of nervousness bled out of him. “No one here is gonna bite you, I promise! We’re all friends here.”

“Friends? I’ve seen half these guys try to run you off the road on multiple occasions!”

“That’s just how it is. You’ll see.”

“I don’t want to see,” Mark grumbled, feeling his stomach tighten a bit at the thought. He didn’t even have a license. What could possibly be so amazing about breaking multiple laws to put yourself in life-threatening danger?

Yukhei wandered off towards the bar’s front entrance, and Mark was left alone. He shuffled awkwardly, wishing Yukhei had at least left him near the car so he could lean against it the way everyone else was. Instead, he was stuck in the middle of the parking lot, separated from every tight cluster he could see. 

Mark went to check his phone and shut it off again as soon as he saw the notification count for his friends’ group chat. Donghyuck and the others were flooding it with demands for updates, and Mark was suddenly glad he’d thought to silence his phone before he left.

He thought, briefly, of checking his school email, but the pulse of panic that shivered down through his torso and his legs put a stop to the thought immediately. There was no reason to bring that into the night when he had enough to worry about already.

“Mark? Is that you?”

The voice jolted him out of his thoughts and he turned to find Kunhang behind him, clutching what appeared to be Ten’s leather jacket around his shoulders.

_ Oh, shit, _ Mark thought.  _ Show time _ .

“Oh, hey Kunhang! How’s it going?” he said, fighting to keep the anxiety from his voice. Damn Yukhei for abandoning him at the most important moment.

“Nothing much. You here with Yukhei?”

Was that a hint of tension in his voice? Was Mark imagining it?

“Uh, yeah. He went inside for a drink though. Should be back in a minute if you wanna say hi.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I would love to. Uh.” Kunhang looked down at his shoes. He seemed strangely uncomfortable for a simple conversation. He’d always been quick to smile and joke around with Mark, despite coming off rather shy.

“Is everything all right?” Mark asked, ducking closer to him. 

Kunhang gave him a surprised look, like he hadn’t meant to be so obvious. 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m all good. The thing is…” he trailed off, frustrated. He put his hands behind his back but Mark could tell he was still fidgeting, and it set off a restless urge in himself that Mark had to push down hard.

“God, Kunhang, just spit it out. You just have to say it,” Kunhang hissed under his breath, like he was repeating something he’d heard.

“Okay, deep breath, come on,” Kunhang continued, and straightened himself up. Mark found himself a little endeared. Kunhang cleared his throat. “Okay. Well. What I came over here to ask was. Um. Is Yukhei single?”

Mark blinked. He felt a little bit like he’d just been slapped. 

“Um,” he said, looking away from Kunhang’s earnest face. What was he supposed to do now? Keep up the charade? Say no? Why was he even asking?

Kunhang’s face fell. “Oh,” he said, making as if to back away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to just blurt it out like that. You don’t have to answer! I shouldn’t have even asked. God, why did I ask, I’m sorry --”

“No, no, it’s okay!” Mark went to grab his arm but thought better of it. He looked like he was about to bolt. “Yes. Yes, he’s single, and um...if maybe you…” Now Mark was the one trailing off.

Kunhang’s eyes widened. “If I? If I what?” But the continued deer-in-headlights look was enough for Mark to know.

He tried to smile reassuringly. “If you were interested, I think maybe you should go for it.”

Kunhang opened his mouth, looking troubled, eyebrows furrowing. “I’m not sure you --”

“Wait, let me finish,” Mark said hastily, words tripping out as he saw Yukhei exit the bar in the distance. He grabbed Kunhang’s arm. “If you and...and Ten, are maybe interested, I totally think you should say something to Yukhei because he never will, he’s a baby like that, and um, I really have to go now because he’s coming back please don’t tell him I said that goodbye!”

He dropped Kunhang’s arm and made a run for it, nearly smacking straight into Yukhei. He grunted in confusion and frowned down at Mark, eyes narrowing suspiciously when he glanced up and saw Kunhang standing in the middle of the parking lot, alone and dumbfounded.

“Mark? What did you do?”

“Nothing, nothing! Is that mine? Thanks I’m so thirsty I’m just gonna drink this whole thing right now,” Mark stammered, grabbing the soda that was clearly Yukhei’s out of his hand and downing half in one go.

“Mark!” And shit, Yukhei was using his whiny baby voice, the one that always worked, and Mark couldn’t tell him what he’d done. Yukhei would be horribly embarrassed and probably upset that Mark had taken it upon himself to spill his crush. 

“I didn’t do anything, I swear,” Mark said, trying desperately to channel Donghyuck’s iron-clad lying voice. No one could see through Donghyuck when he put it on, not even Jeno’s older brother Doyoung who usually called Donghyuck out for all his troublemaking. “Kunhang just came over to say hi. And he seemed really interested in where you were, actually! You know, I really think you have a chance. I’m not even sure we should do this whole fake dating thing, you know? I mean, what were we thinking, listening to Donghyuck? Terrible idea, really.”

Yukhei’s suspicion slid into confusion, but he shook it off as engines began to rev up elsewhere in the parking lot. Full dark had fallen. Kunhang had disappeared again, probably to drive to the next meeting spot with Kun’s gang.

“I mean, if you don’t wanna do it anymore, that’s okay. Maybe you’re right and it wasn’t a good idea. But you’ll still ride with me tonight, right?”

Yukhei gave him the puppy eyes, and Mark was so relieved that he’d dropped the subject that he would have said yes anyway.

It took a good few minutes to get to the spot where they lined their cars up. The last stoplight before the road devolved into endless hairpin turns and long empty stretches through cornfields and dark, quiet houses. There were days where they raced through town of course, but they had been fewer since the last police crackdown, which had resulted in more than a few racers spending the night in a crowded jail cell. Yukhei, thankfully, had not been one of them, though Mark had joined in with his friends to convince Doyoung, the only respectable adult they had regular contact with, to bail out Yukhei’s friend Sicheng.

Mark squinted the whole way down the road, until the car behind them with the blinding LED headlights pulled up on the driver’s side.

Worried as he was, Mark felt like a bit of Yukhei’s adrenaline was seeping into him. Yukhei was near shaking with excitement in his seat, all former concerns wiped off his face. A wide grin replaced it, and he shot Mark a delighted look as the cars began to line up and rev their engines. There were a handful of people outside, near the side of the road, to see the cars take off, but he knew there would be more at the finish line.

Not many. Yukhei had always made it clear it was less about the spectators than it was about the drivers themselves. The driver and the car. Sometimes, when he got really drunk he’d wax poetic about it, ramble about how powerful he felt when he raced, just him and the engine’s roar, the crash and screech of other racers being left behind, the simplest turn of the hand or tap of the foot bringing him barrelling towards the end, towards victory. It was cute, and sometimes a little bit profound if Mark was drunk, too. 

Mark couldn’t help but feel a bit of that too, the engine’s rumbling getting into his bones and igniting an almost pleasant bubble of anticipation and anxiety in the pit of his stomach.  _ Let’s go, go, go _ , it whispered, and Mark latched onto the handle above the door to steel himself.

A hand tapped on the driver’s side door. Yukhei and Mark both jumped, Mark letting out an embarrassing little yelp and clutching his chest reflexively.

It was Kunhang, hanging out the passenger side of Ten’s sports car, gesturing at Yukhei to open his window. Yukhei started at him with wide eyes, frozen, hands tight on the steering wheel. Kunhang gave a confused, but clearly fond, smile, and kept gesturing.

“Yukhei, dude, open the window,” Mark hissed, grabbing his shoulder.

Yukhei remained frozen. He made a little strained sound, and turned pleading eyes to Mark. Mark sighed and leaned across the center console, hitting the window button and accidentally rolling down his own window as well.

“H-hi,” Yukhei stammered, voice high and strained as if he didn’t see Kunhang every day. “What’s up?”

Kunhang leveled a grin at Yukhei, looking far more confident and mischievous than he had when talking to Mark earlier, and leaned back so they could get a glimpse of Ten in the driver’s seat, wearing a smirk that rivaled Donghyuck’s best. Yukhei choked on air, at a loss for words.

“We have a question for you!” Kunhang called.

Mark heard a car pull up next to them, revving its engine. It was hard not to stare at the scene to his left, but Yukhei deserved privacy right?

He turned away to escape the awkwardness and jumped in his seat when he made direct eye contact with the driver who had just pulled up next to them.

The world screeched to a halt. The increasingly loud conversation next to him faded into the background, forgotten entirely.

Mark had never seen someone so beautiful look at him like that.

The driver leaning out of his window had glossy dark hair and large, expressive eyes. He had an arm lying casually out the open window, long fingers studded with chunky silver rings and nails painted a purple so dark it shone black in the dim light. He wasn’t smiling but there was an amused quirk to his mouth as he regarded Mark’s dumbfounded expression. Mark’s hand tightened on the grab bar above him.

“Are you a racer now?” the driver said, and Mark almost stuck the entire upper half of his body out of the window, straining to hear him. He spoke quietly, but confidently, still looking at Mark like he was debating bursting into laughter.

“I, um. You know me?” Mark squeaked. His face felt so warm he knew it must be bright red, and he was having trouble maintaining the racer’s intense eye contact. It wasn’t aggressive, but so attentive that Mark almost felt naked. 

The driver did laugh at that.

“I’ve seen you around before. You a friend of his?” he asked, nodding at Yukhei, who really was halfway out of his window at this point, shouting something at Ten’s car. He sounded even more adrenaline-high than he had a few moments before, so Mark figured he was doing fine.

“Yeah, yes. Um. Just -- just friends, yeah, we’re just friends! Good, uh. Friends.” Mark struggled to think through his brain melting out of his ears. How long had it been since anyone, let alone someone as pretty as this racer, had paid Mark any kind of vaguely flirty attention? Probably since the last time he’d had his life together, which was longer ago than Mark was comfortable admitting.

That earned him another laugh, and the way the driver’s grin increased to a showing of teeth, an edge of something Mark couldn’t pinpoint edging in, made Mark’s knees feel weak even while sitting down.

“ _ Just _ friends, huh? I guess I’m in luck then.”

“ _ Wha-- _ I mean, um. What do you mean?”

“You’re very cute when you’re flustered. Has anyone ever told you that?”

“I -- um. No?”

The driver slipped his hand across the gap between cars and gently pushed Mark’s hand back inside the cab. Mark’s entire body tensed, and his heart fluttered so intensely he thought it might crawl up his throat and come out through his mouth, spew blood all over this cute stranger who was touching Mark’s arm and giving him that look, and fuck Donghyuck and Jaemin for saying he would never get dates hibernating in his room as much as he did, look at him now with this beautiful man! 

“The race is about to start,” the driver said, pulling his arm back inside his own car. “All hands and feet inside the vehicle.”

“Wait!” Mark exclaimed, making to lean out again. “What’s your name?”

The driver only smirked, leaning over to grab something from his passenger seat.

A helmet. A black helmet.

_ Oh no _ .

“I’ll see you after the race!” the driver called, slipping his helmet on as he slammed a foot down on the pedal. He streaked away, nearly unseen in his sleek black car, and Mark stared after him in horror for a fraction of a second before Yukhei hit the gas with a screech of brakes and they were off.

Mark couldn’t tell if Yukhei was a skilled driver or just very, very lucky. He was too scared to even look at the speedometer, keeping his gaze trained firmly on the glove compartment the second he realized they’d taken off. Both front windows were wide open, the wind whistling and whipping around them hard enough to steal the breath from his lungs.

Yukhei didn’t even notice his terror. His foot was nearly flat on the pedal, and he ignored Mark’s indignant shriek when he pulled a hand from the wheel to spin the radio’s volume dial up even higher, whooping with joy and hitting the dashboard along with the beat.

Cars flew by and around them, weaving around each other heedless of the ‘no passing’ signs interspersed along the road. The Japanese racer’s white and red motorcycle zipped along the shoulder next to Mark and cut into the road directly in front of them, and only Yukhei’s quick timing with the brakes and a jerk of the wheel stopped them from slamming into him and the car next to theirs. 

Mark had both hands on the grab bar above him, clinging for dear life and watching in amazement as they weaved in and out of other cars he couldn’t recognize. He saw no sign of Ten’s alien car, either left in the dust or miles ahead of them, and though he tried to stop himself from looking at all he saw no sign of Yukhei’s rival either.

His pounding heart wasn't just because of Yukhei's string of near misses. What had just happened? Mark had never been so blindsided by such a tiny bit of flirting, and he hadn't even known what the man looked like before a few moments ago. God, was he still blushing?

He looked over to see if Yukhei had noticed anything, but his best friend was in his own world now, keen eyes following other racers on all sides and sliding into empty spaces that had not been empty the barest second before. His face was more serious than Mark had ever seen it, with an undercurrent of feral joy he hadn't known Yukhei was capable of.

There was a sort of power in it, Mark supposed, being in control of something so large and dangerous in such a situation. But Mark couldn't imagine it bringing him joy -- the anxiety of balancing his own movement with that of the other racers on the road, all determined to win, to get to the same place first, would probably have left him so terrified he would have to pull over.

No, Mark would never be a street racer. But there was something about being in the passenger seat, of being along for the ride but not in control, that Mark began to find exciting as they continued on, the landscape blurring by them as they sped up ever faster. Yukhei's shouts of outrage and encouragement at other racers fed the spark of adrenaline inside him, and Mark began to shout along with him, grinning over at him as Yukhei passed car after car, finally catching up to two lone cars speeding side by side.

Silver and black. Ten and...Yukhei's rival, whoever he really was. Excitement flared in the pit of Mark's stomach, and in the privacy of his own mind he admitted that it wasn't Ten he was happy to see. 

"I'm fucking winning this thing!" Yukhei shouted, startling Mark out of his thoughts. He glanced at Mark quickly, grinning wide. "Having fun, bro?"

Mark tried very hard not to look out the windshield at the black car. He smiled nervously even though Yukhei had returned his focus to the road ahead of them.

"Yeah, I guess I am," Mark answered, still a bit surprised to realize it was true. His body felt a bit like it was in free fall, but for once the lack of control didn't make him want to scream.

It was a near thing, but once Mark could force himself to focus on the road it was easy to see that there was a slowly growing space between the front two cars and the others. Ten and the mystery driver really seemed to know what they were doing.

Yukhei was steadily outpacing the other racers as well, jumping out into that open space and taking third just as they entered the home stretch. Mark could see another stoplight far up ahead, the same spot he’d waited before when Yukhei was racing, with a small collection of friends and onlookers clustered at the little picnic spot on the side of the road. They were almost there.

Mark couldn’t tell which car was in the lead. They seemed to be going back and forth, driving right alongside each other. Mark couldn’t tell if Kunhang still had his window open or not, but the helmeted driver certainly didn’t. Thankfully there weren’t any unsuspecting cars attempting to drive down the opposite side of the road -- Ten’s silver car was taking up most of the lane, unwilling to give up the lead to get back on the correct side. Mark supposed the scream of car engines and the screech of brakes would have alerted anyone unaware, but he was still grateful that they had chosen to race on a less populated road that night. He couldn’t imagine how dangerous racing through town would have been, especially with the local police on higher alert than usual.

They were seconds from the informal finish line when Mark saw it out of the corner of his eye and felt a bolt of panic -- there, on the side of the road nearest Yukhei’s rival, was a collection of dark shapes that looked suspiciously deer-shaped.

_ Oh no _ , Mark thought, leaning helplessly forward in his seat and too surprised to get a word out. Yukhei, focused as he was on the race, didn’t appear to notice the shapes. Mark’s stomach roiled with worry and he threw all his will into mentally begging the deer to remain on the side of the road. He had been avoiding looking at Yukhei’s speedometer and could only imagine how disastrous it would be if there was a collision with either car at this speed. And all of the cars behind them? It could be a pile-up.

“Yukhei, I think --”

Mark didn’t get a chance to finish the thought. One of the deer darted out into the road, right in front of the black car, giving its driver only seconds to respond. 

With a screech of grinding metal, the black car jerked to the side, hard, and slammed straight into Ten’s car, hitting it hard enough to knock it onto the opposite shoulder of the road. Mark’s alarmed shout echoed Yukhei’s, who slammed on the brakes and threw his car into park. He was out of the vehicle before Mark could even process that they’d stopped, and he could hear other cars stopping around them. He wondered, dazed, if they were all stopping to check on the drivers or if they simply couldn’t continue the race with so many cars already in the way.

He extricated himself from the car and took in the scene. Yukhei had sprinted over to Ten’s car already, leaning in the open passenger side door. He was pulling Kunhang out with his arm over his shoulder, leaning in and whispering to him urgently. There was a thin cut on his forehead, and he looked a bit shell-shocked, but seemed otherwise fine. He was sending a worried frown in the direction of the black car, still sprawled in the middle of the road, crumpled along the side. 

Mark debated fiercely with himself for a split second, but his feet were already moving. He ran up to the black car and knocked urgently on the window. When there was no response after a second he grabbed the car handle and threw the driver’s side door open.

The mystery driver turned to look at him with wide eyes. He’d pulled his helmet off, which seemed to have protected him well from the crash, but all color had drained from his face. His eyes blazed with anxiety, and he leaned into Mark, reaching out to grab his hand. Mark forced the fluttery feeling in the pit of his stomach to pipe down. 

“Is everyone alright?” the driver stammered, tightening his grip on Mark’s hand. He looked genuinely worried, and Mark couldn’t help the way his hand wrapped around the other man’s. 

“I didn’t mean to hit them, it was a knee-jerk reaction, are they all right? I know Ten had a passenger with him, I hope they’re okay --” he was still babbling, leaning even harder into Mark like he wanted to push him aside and leap from the car.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m pretty sure everyone’s fine, just a little shocked,” Mark soothed, trying to take up enough space to stop him from moving. “Just take it easy for a second, are you okay?”

“What? Yes, yes, I’m fine, is anyone else hurt? They came onto the road so quick I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t mean to hurt anyone.”

Mark gave into his impulse and leaned in to wrap an arm around his shoulder. He chanced a quick look over his own and saw that Ten had emerged from his car. He seemed uninjured, and far more interested in frowning over the small cut on Kunhang’s forehead than he was in anything else. Yukhei was hovering over the both of them, clearly worried, but overall Mark figured they had been lucky. 

“Everyone is fine, my friend is looking after them. Nothing too bad, maybe some damage to the cars. Are you sure you’re okay?”

The steady pressure of Mark’s arm around him seemed to work some magic. The driver’s shoulders slowly relaxed from where they’d been tight around his ears. He took a long, slow breath, avoiding eye contact with Mark. He was quiet for a moment, as if he was assessing himself.

“Yes,” he said, voice quieter and less shaky than it had been. “Yes, I think I’m fine. Thank you.”

He looked up, and for the first time seemed to realize it was Mark standing in front of him. A small smile crept onto his face, the anxiety fading a bit.

“It’s you,” he said, leaning deliberately into Mark’s space now. Mark felt his face flushing, struggling against the urge to tear his arm from this man and make a run for it while he still could. How could he be making him so nervous?

“Thank you for coming over here to check on me,” the driver said softly. He reached up and squeezed Mark’s arm, and Mark squeaked embarrassingly. 

“I -- I don’t even know your name,” he blurted out, ears burning.

His grin was even wider now, that flirty edge that had so flustered Mark earlier creeping back in.

“My name is Jungwoo,” he said.

“Jungwoo, that’s, uh, that’s a nice name, thank you for telling me,” Mark stammered in response, backing away from the driver’s side door.

Jungwoo slowly pulled himself out of the driver’s seat. Mark saw him turn back for a second, reaching for the helmet that had been discarded on the floor of the passenger’s side, and then turn back around.

Jungwoo saw him looking. His expression turned serious and he nodded towards Ten’s car.

“I need to go apologize,” he said firmly. “It wouldn’t be right to wear it.”

He started off towards the car and Mark followed hastily. Yukhei was the only one who saw them coming, and Mark saw his confused glance between himself and Jungwoo, the glance back towards Jungwoo’s black car, and the deep frown that quickly overtook his confusion.

_ Uh oh, _ Mark thought.  _ Yukhei’s pissed. _

Mark jogged a bit to keep up with Jungwoo’s long legs and confident stride.

Yukhei moved to intercept Jungwoo.

“What the hell was that?” he demanded, gesturing at Ten’s car. The passenger side was a bit crumpled.

Jungwoo faltered a bit at his aggression, and before Mark could think better of it he gave Jungwoo’s hand a reassuring squeeze where Yukhei couldn’t see. The protective feeling that rose up in him was odd, especially when it was his own best friend he wanted to protect Jungwoo from. 

Jungwoo seemed to appreciate it, at least, because his voice was steadier when he started again.

“I’m sorry,” he began. “There was a deer that ran out into the road and I swerved to avoid it. I wasn’t thinking about Ten being right beside me. That was my fault, and I hope no one was hurt. Can I talk to him?”

Yukhei blinked. Mark could see the tension fall away from his shoulders as he processed Jungwoo’s calm tone and apologetic expression.

“Yeah, if Ten is up to it, I guess,” Yukhei said, an edge of suspicion still in his tone. He stood aside and Jungwoo stepped past him, his arm slipping from Mark’s grip. Mark missed it a little despite himself.

“Thanks for going to check on him,” Yukhei said, clapping a hand on Mark’s shoulder. Mark startled a bit, but matched Yukhei’s grin.

“Yeah, I’m glad he was all right. That was scary, though. Does that happen a lot?” Mark put a hand over his chest, glad his heart was finally slowing down.

“Not all the time, but yeah. It happens. Out here in the back roads it’s the deer and shit, but when we finally get back to the regular roads it’ll be other drivers. It’s always a little dangerous, but that’s why it’s fun!”

Mark frowned at him. “I respectfully disagree,” he said.

Yukhei laughed. “It’s not that big a deal, I promise. I was only pissed because I thought he’d done it on purpose at first. But there really was a deer?”

“Yeah, of course there was! Why do you think he would lie?” Mark tried desperately to keep the defensive tone out of his voice. He didn’t know Jungwoo. He hadn’t even spoken to him before tonight. Why was he getting all worked up?

“I don’t know, man. I don’t know what it is about him but he just gets on my nerves! That helmet he wears all the time? This is the first time I’ve even seen his face. He just…holds himself apart from everyone else, you know? And he showed up here out of nowhere a few months ago and just started kicking everyone’s ass. Maybe I’m a little jealous,” Yukhei admitted, running an embarrassed hand through his hair. 

“He seems nice,” Mark said tentatively, avoiding eye contact.

“Hey, he’s still my rival!” Yukhei said sharply, looking offended. “That’s like, a conflict of interest!”

Mark laughed nervously. 

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” he said. “Conflict of interest. Yeah, I totally get it. What was I thinking.”

Yukhei had already moved on, heading back towards his own car. Mark glanced over towards Ten’s car and saw Jungwoo still talking with him and Kunhang, an apologetic slant to the line of his shoulders. Ten didn’t seem angry, even grinning and joking around with him a bit as Mark watched. Kunhang seemed fine as well, sitting on top of the hood with what Mark suddenly realized was Yukhei’s jacket draped over his shoulders.

_ Well _ , he thought _ , at least something good came out of this. _

“Everything all right?” Mark heard a voice call. He turned and saw the Japanese racer, standing next to the tall one Mark had seen Taeyong talking to earlier that night. He glanced to either side of him, seeing no one, and realized that he was the one being addressed.

“Oh, uh, yeah, everything is fine. The cars are a little banged up though,” he answered.

“Oh, don’t worry about the cars. It’s not a real race unless some of them get a bit messed up. Keeps the mechanics in business, you know? I’m Yuta. I’ve seen you around before, you’re usually with Yukhei, right?”

“Yeah, he’s my best friend,” Mark answered.

“Nice kid. Surprised he finally made a move, though. Ten’s a hard guy to crack.”

“Actually, I think Kunhang and Ten made the first move,” Mark said, laughing.

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Yuta said.

“We should get moving,” the other racer piped up, looking around at the bottleneck the crash had caused. “If we linger too long, we risk someone calling the police.”

Yuta sighed and nodded. “Johnny’s right. Are your friends good to drive back to the bar?”

Mark looked over his shoulder and saw Yukhei back over by Ten’s car, hovering and trying not to look like he was. Mark hid a smile. Yukhei really had it bad, his hands fluttering at his sides like he was trying not to reach out for Kunhang or Ten, who were both watching him with fond, slightly exasperated looks. Ten ducked into the driver’s side and Mark heard his engine start up with a stuttering roar.

Jungwoo was back by his own car, leaning against the side. He held his helmet in one arm, occasionally glancing down at it like he was tempted to put it back on. He seemed a bit uncomfortable with the scrutiny, and Mark wondered suddenly if that was why he was always wearing the thing. Did he want to avoid too much attention? 

Mark wanted to go back over to him, but every time the thought came up his mind flashed back to Yukhei. A conflict of interest. How seriously did Yukhei take this rivalry? It bothered Mark that he couldn’t really tell. An ill-timed collision with his crush’s car was probably not helping.

“Yeah, it looks like we’re all good. Thanks.”

“Hey, no problem. You looked a bit shaken up. First race?”

Mark laughed, nodding. “That obvious?”

“Oh, totally. You’ll get the hang of it, if you keep at it. Maybe one day you’ll be a racer, too,” Yuta teased, grinning.

“Oh, I don’t think so,” Mark answered. “I’ll stick to being a passenger, if anything.”

Yuta and Johnny waved goodbye as they headed back to their rides, and soon enough most of the other drivers headed back as well.

Mark paused in the middle of the road, conflicted. A large part of him wanted to go back to Jungwoo, who still lingered alone next to his car. The other part of him knew he should probably just head over to Yukhei and tell him he was done for the night. He’d had enough of the racing scene, he thought. No need to get involved with someone who lived a dangerous lifestyle, even if he seemed to take it seriously. Especially if it was someone his best friend didn’t seem to like very much. 

Yukhei, Kunhang, and Ten were crowded together, talking quietly. It looked like an intimate conversation, Kunhang’s hand lingering near Yukhei’s like he was psyching himself up to hold it. Mark bit his lower lip, glancing at Jungwoo out of the corner of his eye. The opportunity was too much temptation.

He walked over to Jungwoo and hovered awkwardly until he glanced up. The genuine smile he gave made Mark’s knees feel weak all over again.

“Hey,” Mark said, mentally willing Jungwoo to lead the conversation so he wouldn’t embarrass himself yet again.

“Hey yourself,” Jungwoo said. His eyes lingered on Mark’s for a heated second, and then slowly lowered to take the rest of Mark in. Mark blushed horribly, trying not to feel too self-conscious. Jaemin had helped him dress for the night, intending to strike envy in Kunhang and Ten. In the end it hadn’t been necessary, but Mark had almost forgotten how he’d looked in the mirror, at the simple tight black jeans and tucked in white T-shirt, and felt good about his appearance for once.

“I -- uh. Well, I was just. Wondering if you were going back to Taeyong’s bar? Maybe we could…” Mark trailed off when Jungwoo shook his head, looking apologetic again.

“I would love to, really. Especially if that was an invitation,” he said, grinning at Mark’s sheepish look. “But I think I’ve had enough for one night. And I don’t think your friend would like us hanging out very much,” he concluded, nodding at Yukhei, who had turned to regard their conversation with some suspicion.

Mark sighed, shoulders slumping. “You’re probably right,” he said. “I don’t know what Yukhei’s problem is. But. Despite all that. I hope I’ll see you again?”

Jungwoo smiled even wider. “I’m here every week. I would love to see you again, if this hasn’t scared you off completely. If  _ I _ haven’t scared you off. God,” Jungwoo said, looking away shyly. Mark couldn’t help but be endeared at his odd combination of confidence and shyness. “Was that too forward of me? That was probably too forward. It’s just this is the first time I’ve seen you here in a while and I was beginning to wonder if you’d ever be back.”

Mark blinked at him, shocked. “You pay that much attention to me?” 

“You’re very cute, Mark. I might have been admiring from afar, a bit. I have to admit I might have been a bit aggressive with Yukhei during races because I thought he was your boyfriend. I’m glad I was wrong about that.”

“Me too,” Mark said before he could stop himself. He groaned at Jungwoo’s amused look. “I think...you’re cute, too, oh god I’m sorry I haven’t done this in a long time,” he stammered as Jungwoo started to laugh.

“You don’t need to apologize,” he said quietly. “I’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah,” Mark said hopefully. “Yeah, you will.”

Jungwoo nodded at him and climbed back into his car. Mark turned back to Yukhei and the others as his engine started and slowly pulled away.

He avoided Yukhei’s suspicious gaze and instead looked at Kunhang. Who was watching him with a knowing, amused look. Mark looked at Ten instead, and got much the same. Yukhei it was, then. 

“Hey, are we ready to go?” Mark said awkwardly, refusing to acknowledge the question in Yukhei’s eyes.  _ God, I can’t believe I just flirted with my best friend’s rival right in front of him _ , Mark thought.  _ Who the hell am I? _

“Yeah, I guess,” Yukhei said slowly, looking over at the space where Jungwoo’s car had just been. “What was that all about?”  
“Oh, that? Nothing! Nothing at all, I was just talking to him about uh…how you’re totally gonna beat him next time you race!”

Kunhang slapped a hand over his mouth to hide his laugh.

“Really?” Yukhei said, and there was a genuinely touched note in his voice. Mark was a terrible person. The worst. What was he doing?

“Yeah, totally!” Mark said frantically, trying to turn the edge of panic into enthusiasm.

“Does that mean you’ll keep coming? To the races, I mean?” Yukhei asked. He looked excited, and Mark felt even worse. How could he say yes, when he knew it would only be an excuse to see Jungwoo again? Yukhei wanted to share something with Mark and Mark was only considering it to further a crush that hadn’t existed a few hours before.

“Yeah, dude, I’ll keep coming,” Mark said, voice faltering. “If it makes you happy. I won’t say I didn’t have fun.”

“Well, as nice as that is, we do need to get a move on,” Ten said suddenly, hopping down from where he’d been sitting on the hood of his car. “You, big man, owe me a date, I think.”

“I -- I do?” Yukhei stammered, victorious grin fading into slight panic.

“Of course you do. Did you forget we asked you out before I crashed like an idiot? No time like the present, sweetheart.”

Yukhei didn’t seem to know what to say to that, turning wide eyes to Mark as if asking  _ Are you seeing this? _

Mark gave him a shrug in response.

“So are either of you gonna spill, or do I have to keep nagging until you do?” Donghyuck demanded, frowning at Mark and Yukhei from across the table. They were at the university cafeteria, and Mark hadn’t seen Yukhei since a few days ago when he’d dropped him off at his dorm after the race. He exchanged a long-suffering look with Yukhei, who looked like he hadn’t slept in a while. His hair was ruffled, and Mark thought he could spy the edge of a new bruise just underneath the collar of his shirt. He suppressed a grin.

“Yeah, Yukhei, why don’t you spill?” he said, joining Donghyuck in his pressuring. Yukhei looked back and forth between them, betrayed at Mark’s sudden switch.

“There’s nothing to spill!” he insisted, crossing his arms over his chest defensively.

Mark sat back in his seat. “Let’s just say your stupid plan was unnecessary,” he said smugly.

“Did you just call my brilliant plan that clearly worked because I can see the hickeys  _ stupid _ ?” Donghyuck hissed, reaching across the table for Mark’s throat. “I am a  _ genius _ , see if I ever help you get a boyfriend, Mark Lee!”

“They didn’t even notice us pretending Mark was my boyfriend. They asked me out anyway,” Yukhei said. The soft look of awe in his wide eyes made it clear he couldn’t really believe it either.

Donghyuck snorted. “I refuse to believe that. My plan worked, and I will accept no other explanation. Thank you for proving me right yet again.”

Mark and Yukhei exchanged amused glances.

Donghyuck quickly moved onto another topic, and Mark tuned him out as he went back to his breakfast. Mark had spent the past few days trying in vain to ignore thoughts of Jungwoo, his soft-looking black hair and his flirty grin. He had enough on his plate with that final project for music production he hadn’t even started, and for once he was grateful for the constant, all-consuming stress.

No, there was no room for Mark to pine over a racer he’d only met once. Certainly not his best friend’s rival, as ridiculous as Mark thought the whole thing was.

Even if Mark clearly was pining over a racer he’d only met once, because now he was hallucinating him, imagining that the dark-haired boy in the face mask and slouchy black sweatshirt in the food line was Jungwoo.

Wait. That  _ was _ Jungwoo. Mark tensed all over, then sent a quick glance to his seatmates to make sure they hadn’t noticed. Yukhei and Donghyuck had circled back around to Yukhei’s date, and now Donghyuck was grilling him for details, sufficiently distracted. He snuck another glance toward the food line and nearly dropped the fork he was holding when he met Jungwoo’s gaze head-on.

Jungwoo saw him glancing and smiled, obvious even under the face mask. With a wink, he turned away from Mark and walked up to the food counter. Mark’s heart skipped a beat. He wanted to jump from his seat and walk right up to Jungwoo, ask him to sit down with his friends and eat with him. But knowing Yukhei wouldn’t be happy about it made him hesitate, and Jungwoo seemed content to stick to his own friends, leaving the food line with a last amused glance in Mark’s direction before he went to sit with a small group on the other side of the cafeteria.

_ This is bad _ , Mark thought.  _ This is very bad. _

Mark didn’t see much of Yukhei over the next few weeks. Yukhei had admitted during a video game session in Mark’s dorm room that things with Kunhang and Ten were moving quickly, and he was spending a lot of time with them.

He’d expressed some worry about being an outsider in an established relationship, but Mark had soothed him by explaining how Renjun, Jaemin, and Jeno had gotten together and how they’d had a few bumps along the road until they settled.

“Besides, man,” he’d said, juggling the controller and a can of soda in one hand, “they really seemed to like you from what I saw. You didn’t even need me to get their attention, you already had it.”

That had cheered Yukhei up considerably, and Mark saw no need to mention that his outburst with Kunhang had probably given them the push they needed to speak up. Yukhei was happy, and Kunhang and Ten appeared to be as well, so what was the harm?

If only Mark’s love life was in a similar place.

He’d gotten a few glimpses of Jungwoo around campus, now that he was on the lookout for him, but it was always at a distance. He was too nervous to approach him, even when he knew Yukhei wasn’t around. What if he’d imagined Jungwoo’s flirting, or Jungwoo hadn’t been serious about it?

Jungwoo kept himself at a distance as well, exchanging the occasional warm glance with Mark but seeming content to leave it at that. He always looked busy, hauling stacks of books around or having animated conversations with the small group of friends Mark often saw him with. It was strange, Mark thought, that he saw Jungwoo all over the place when he’d never taken notice of him before. Was it just that he was on the lookout now? Or was Jungwoo gravitating towards him too?

“Is anyone sitting here?”

Mark was startled out of his thoughts at the sudden question, and glanced up to see Jungwoo standing over him, a backpack slung over one shoulder and a shy grin edging up one corner of his mouth.

“No, no, no one is sitting there,” Mark stammered, scrambling to move his massive pile of books and pencils out of the way. “Please, sit down.”

“Thanks,” Jungwoo said, pulling the chair out. He settled down in it and dropped his backpack on the ground. He took in Mark’s slender laptop, the chunky headphones he had slipped off to hang around his neck, the scatter of notebooks.

“What do you study?” he asked.

“Oh, I’m in music production,” Mark said, stacking the notebooks up and closing them so Jungwoo couldn’t see the chicken scratch of failed lyrics. He’d been up for what felt like three days straight, trying to get started on this final project, but he’d been getting nowhere. It was always hard for him to work up the motivation until the deadline was staring him down from every corner. It was a terrible way to work, but sitting in the library as he had been for the last few hours hadn’t gotten him anywhere, either.

“Oh, wow, that’s so cool,” Jungwoo said, excitement brightening his smile. He looked a little worn out as well, dark circles under his eyes. Mark wondered if he was in the same boat. Finals were quickly approaching for everyone, and things on campus had been a bit tense.

“Yeah, it’s always been my passion, I guess,” Mark said, embarrassed at Jungwoo’s intense look of interest. He had to admit it was nice to have someone who seemed genuinely into it, though.

“What about you? What are you studying?” Mark asked.

“Oh, I’m in the nursing program,” Jungwoo said, pulling a medical textbook out of his bag to show Mark. “It’s a lot of late nights, but it’s been worth it.”

“You’re in the nursing program?” Mark repeated, astonished. “You do all that and still have time to be a kick ass street racer on the weekends?”

Mark immediately regretted speaking, burying his face in his hands with a groan.

“God, please ignore that I said that, I’m sorry,” Mark whined. 

Jungwoo laughed, reaching across the table to gently pull Mark’s hands from his face. His hands were soft, but Mark could feel rough calluses, most likely from driving, as Jungwoo lowered Mark’s hands to the library table. He stroked his thumbs along the back of Mark’s hands soothingly, and Mark stared down at the table, heart fluttering.

“You don’t have to apologize, Mark,” Jungwoo said fondly. “I think it’s cute how flustered you get.”

“How are you so confident about everything?” Mark asked quietly, slowly curling one hand around one of Jungwoo’s. Even that simple act made his ears burn.

Jungwoo laughed, a bit too loudly for the library. A few students looked their way, and Jungwoo reflexively tightened his grip on Mark’s hand when he went to pull away. He gave Mark a sheepish grin.

“Sorry, sorry,” he laughed. “It’s just that I'm not really confident about anything. I’m just a very good actor.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really. I can’t believe I’ve even managed to approach you so many times. Do you know how long that took me to work up to?”

They were still holding hands. Mark kept sneaking glances down, to make sure he wasn’t imagining it. Jungwoo’s expression was soft and open, and Mark wanted to stay wrapped in it forever.

“I’m really glad you did,” he whispered. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I am. I just…” Mark trailed off. Yukhei’s suspicious face after the race last week rose unbidden in his mind. He frowned a little.

“Your friend. You’re worried about what he’ll think,” Jungwoo guessed.

“Yeah. I mean, I don’t know that he really takes the whole rival thing seriously but I don’t know how he’ll react, you know?”

“Rival?” Jungwoo asked, looking confused. “Me?”

“Uh, yeah? He said you were his racing rival, or something. Did you not know that?”

Jungwoo snorted, then looked abruptly embarrassed. It was horribly endearing. Mark was in so much trouble.

“No, I had no idea! I thought he just didn’t like me very much. I guess I kind of block out the other racers.”

“Any reason why? Yukhei did say you kind of kept to yourself.”

“Oh, well, um…” Jungwoo looked down, uncomfortable.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. Sorry.”

“Oh no, don’t worry about it, Mark. It’s just a lot to get into in the library on a Tuesday, you know?”

“Yeah. Do you want to study with me, maybe?”

Jungwoo smiled, giving Mark’s hand a firm squeeze before pulling away to open his textbook.

“I would love that,” he said quietly, and Mark couldn’t help the sharp spark of delight that ignited in the pit of his stomach. He forced himself to return to his computer, feeling lighter than he had in months.

Later that night, back in his dorm room, Mark pulled a fresh notebook out of his never-ending stack. He sat down on his bed, still in his school clothes, and wrote for what felt like hours. Lyrics, poem lines, little bits and pieces that had been floating around in his head for months but never concrete enough to put down in words. Lines about pretty dark eyes and soft hands, warm and real. 

He wrote until his exhaustion finally caught up with him, and then forced himself to lock the notebook in the bottom drawer of his desk. He’d be horribly embarrassed about it in the morning, he knew. But for now, he reveled in the feeling of having words on a page, words on a page that he  _ liked _ , for the first time in months.

Yukhei had convinced most of their friends to accompany him to the bar that night. It was a special occasion, he’d explained, looking a bit hesitant as everyone snuck glances at Ten and Kunhang, hanging back behind him. Kunhang looked gently supportive, but Ten looked downright smug, staring down Donghyuck and Jaemin until they returned their curious gazes to Yukhei.

“Is it your anniversary already?” Renjun demanded, glancing between the three of them. “It’s been like a month. I mean, congratulations, but Saturdays are date nights for us.”

“No, no,” Yukhei said hastily. “I meant for the racers! We’re finally gonna hit the main drag on Saturday, now that stuff has settled down a bit. It’s gonna be fun! I was wondering if you guys wanted to tag along, maybe?”

Yukhei turned the puppy eyes up to eleven, pouting at the assembled group until there was a collective groan.

“Okay, okay,” Donghyuck conceded. “We’ll show up to support you in your little race. You’d better win, though!”

Ten snorted. “He’s not gonna win. I’m gonna win.”

Yukhei turned his pleading gaze onto Ten.

“Don’t pull that with me,” Ten snapped, looking affected despite himself. “I’m not pulling my punches just because we’re dating.”

Now, Mark found himself hovering near the counter in Taeyong’s bar, looking around for Jungwoo despite his best efforts to keep himself calm. He’d never seen Jungwoo there before, but couldn’t help but hope he would show up tonight.

Mark couldn’t explain what it was about Jungwoo that had him so out of sorts. He hadn’t had a boyfriend, or even a crush, in so long that it was almost unfamiliar territory. He and Jungwoo had continued their study not-dates over the last few weeks, usually not speaking much but focusing on their own work in shared silence.

A few days ago he had worked up the courage to let Jungwoo listen to a few older compositions of his, and Jungwoo’s genuine interest and appreciation had filled him with so much warmth he’d nearly floated back to his dorm later that night.

“These songs are really good,” Jungwoo had insisted, leaning in to get a better look at the computer screen, putting a soft hand on Mark’s thigh to get better balance. 

“Th-thank you,” Mark had stammered, looking from Jungwoo’s intensely focused face down to his hand on his thigh. “That really means a lot. Half the time I feel like I’m shouting down a dark hallway, writing and composing all this stuff just for myself and the professors.”

“You have so much talent,” Jungwoo said quietly, turning that fond smile on him again, the one that made Mark feel like his insides were melting. “Thank you for sharing this with me.”

Even the memory of it made Mark flush. He was so far gone already, and he and Jungwoo hadn’t even discussed what they were doing. The problem of Yukhei’s one-sided rivalry persisted, and Mark was afraid that if he were to tell his best friend what was happening, he would be upset. Not just that Mark was involved with someone he didn’t seem to like very much, but that he hadn’t told Yukhei about it until nearly a month in. What kind of friend was he?

But Yukhei had been so busy lately with his new boyfriends. Though he wasn’t upset at Yukhei’s new relationship in the slightest, he had been a bit lonely. All of his other friends were dating as well, and Jungwoo had filled the sudden void in his life better than Mark could have imagined. 

Yukhei would understand. Mark had to believe that.

And if he could just find Jungwoo, maybe pull him aside and have a serious conversation without getting distracted, then he could get it all straightened out tonight.

Despite the joy his time with Jungwoo was bringing, it was getting even harder for Mark to focus on the projects and essays that were piling up on him. The lyrics he’d written that first night after studying with Jungwoo were too personal for him to even contemplate using. Every time Mark went to sleep, he was kept up for hours worrying over work that hadn’t been touched yet -- reports he hadn’t turned in, textbook chapters he hadn’t read. If he thought about it for too long the stress began to bury him alive like an avalanche. He couldn’t afford to tie himself in knots over his personal life, too.

But there was no sign of Jungwoo, and Mark resigned himself to looking for him after the race later.

“Hey, Yukhei,” he called, walking back over to their table. He steeled himself, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. This was Yukhei. Goofy, lovable Yukhei who didn’t have a cruel bone in his body. His best friend.

Yukhei looked up, cheeks puffy from the massive gulp of soda he’d just taken. No alcohol for Yukhei tonight. He made an inquisitive sound, setting his glass back down.

“Can I ride with you again tonight? If, you know, Kunhang isn’t.”

Yukhei swallowed his soda and nodded enthusiastically, grinning.

“Yeah, man, of course! I knew you would get into it eventually. You wanna drive?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“No, no, no, there will be no driving me for me tonight, do you want to die?” Mark hissed, sitting himself down next to Jeno.

“I think you should let him drive,” Renjun said, grinning.

“It’s not happening,” Mark insisted. “I just want to give it another chance, I guess.”

There had to be something that Jungwoo got out of racing. Maybe the same sort of thing Yukhei got out of it? Whatever it was, Mark wanted to experience it, too. 

By the time Yukhei was getting ready to leave, Mark had given up on seeing Jungwoo. They left the rest of their friends behind at the bar, cheering them on with shouts and lifted beer glasses. Out on the main roads through town there would be no place for people to spectate. Just the racers and the road.

Mark couldn’t deny his nerves as he climbed into Yukhei’s passenger seat. Yukhei lingered by Ten’s car, an arm around both him and Kunhang. Mark looked away, feeling weird about watching his best friend as he leaned down from his considerable height to give both of his boyfriends a quick kiss. Mark felt the tiniest little pinch of jealousy and tried to shove it out of his thoughts. If all went well, maybe he would be giving Jungwoo a good luck kiss at next week’s race.

He could only hope.

Yukhei climbed into the car with him and sent an excited smirk his way.

“You ready to win for real?” he said, turning the car on with a flick of his wrist. He seemed far more in his element this time, calm and steady as they pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the main street through town.

The main street was still fairly busy this time of night, with all of the major department stores and restaurants crowded on either side. It was a dangerous place to race because of the congestion, but it was also one of the longest, straightest roads in town, allowing the racers to gain incredible speeds without the risk of sharp turns. Mark couldn’t tell if he was more excited or nervous as Yukhei pulled up to the stoplight that marked their starting point and revved his engine. He could see Ten, Yuta, and Johnny around them, crowded into the surrounding lanes and behind them, but no sign of Jungwoo no matter how far he looked. He tried to keep the disappointment from showing on his face.

“You ready?” Yukhei asked. 

Mark took a deep breath, staring down the length of the road ahead of them and feeling the adrenaline creeping into his gut, like he was on a rollercoaster that hadn’t taken off yet.

“Yeah,” he said with a quiet laugh, surprised at his own anticipation.

“Yeah!” Yukhei shouted back at him, and spun the volume dial on the radio up as far as he could. The light flashed green. He took off with a screech of brakes, and Mark felt himself blown back into his seat. Immediately, he felt that they were going faster than they had last time, the open road in front of them allowing Yukhei to focus only on going forward. He quickly and easily passed the non-racers, pulling out in front with Johnny just behind them, his huge beast of a truck taking up the entirety of the rearview mirror. 

Mark found himself laughing, singing loudly along to Yukhei’s terrible music choices as they flew at breakneck speed down the road, weaving in and out of unsuspecting drivers and leaving the other racers in the dust. He let himself get lost in the feeling of freedom, the restaurants passing in a blur of neon lights. 

He turned to shout song lyrics at Yukhei, laughing, and in that moment saw Jungwoo’s car break out from the crowd to roar into the lane right beside them. His astonished face alerted Yukhei, who turned to see Jungwoo’s car and let out a curse. He doubled his efforts at the wheel, foot slamming the accelerator down. They jumped forward, but Jungwoo matched their pace easily, and Mark, tense as a bowstring, watched the ‘finish line,’ the last stoplight before the main drag tapered off into sidestreets, rapidly approaching as Yukhei and Jungwoo continued neck and neck. 

It was a near thing, but Jungwoo put on a sudden, crazy burst of speed and blew through the last light right before Yukhei did, unconcerned with the explosion of outraged car horns. Yukhei gave a defeated groan, but even Jungwoo’s win didn’t dampen his spirits too much. 

The racers around them slowly decreased speed, melting away into side-streets just in case there had been any police around alerted by the race. Mark heard no sirens in the distance, thankfully, but he kept an eye out as Yukhei slowed down to a reasonable speed, taking the same side street that Jungwoo had. It was one that circled back around to Taeyong’s bar, and Mark hoped desperately that Jungwoo would stop there as well.

The excitement of the race, however brief, stayed with Mark as he turned to Yukhei with a burst of confidence.

“Yukhei,” he said, urgently enough that his best friend turned to him with a little bit of concern. He waved it away, smiling, trying to psyche himself up. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing bad. I hope. I just need to tell you something.”

“Okay? Yeah, go ahead. I thought something was up with you lately, but I haven’t really been able to ask. Sorry I’ve been so busy, dude. It’s just things moved so quickly --”

“No, no, it’s okay, I’m happy you’re happy, you know? Anyway, I hope… Um. I hope you’ll feel the same way for me?”

“Oh?” Yukhei turned to look at him again, eyes wide. “Did you meet someone? How could you not tell me, man, that’s great! What’s his name?”

Mark faltered. “Uh, well… You see, um. His name is Jungwoo.”

Yukhei nodded, clearly not making the connection. “Yeah? Is he nice?”

“Yeah, he is, actually, he’s really nice. We’ve been hanging out a lot lately and it’s been great. The thing is, though. You kind of know him already?”

“I do?”

“Yeah. See, the reason I haven’t said anything yet is because I wasn’t sure how you would react. Jungwoo is a racer, too.”

“Really? I mean, I’ve never heard that name before but I guess there’s a lot. Did you meet him when you came with me a few weeks back? I didn’t see you talking to anyone but me, Ten, Kunhang, and...oh.”

Mark hid his face in his hands. “Yeah,” he said quietly, afraid to look Yukhei’s way.

“You thought I would be upset?” Yukhei said, pulling the car to a stop in the parking lot of the bar. Out of the corner of his eye, Mark saw Jungwoo’s car on the other side of the lot, idling with the headlights still on.

“Yeah? I mean, you said he was your rival and all, and I thought, I don’t know, you said it was a conflict of interest!”

“Oh, Mark, it was a joke,” Yukhei said softly, leaning over to give his thigh a reassuring pat. “I didn’t think you would take it that seriously, man, I’m sorry. Sometimes I get so into the competition thing. I didn’t mean to make you all worried about that.”

“No, it’s okay,” Mark sighed, feeling the tension beginning to drain from his shoulders now that he knew Yukhei wouldn’t start yelling. “I guess I was just overthinking. Like I always do. And honestly I’ve been really stressed about schoolwork and all that, lately. It kind of just all balled together until it bled into this too.”

“Hey, you don’t need to apologize! I should have realized how stressed out you were and like, checked in with you about it or something. That’s my bad, I got caught up with Kunhang and Ten.”

Mark was embarrassed to feel tears welling up in his eyes. He took a deep breath that turned into a sniff.

“Are you crying? Oh my god, Mark,” Yukhei laughed, leaning into him even more.

“Stop, you’ll set me off,” Mark whined, hiding his face again. “You’re just. A good friend, Yukhei. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me! You put up with my shit every day. You’re a good friend. And I trust your judgement,” Yukhei said, kindly ignoring Mark’s continued sniffling. “If you really like this Jungwoo guy I will overlook the fact that he routinely kicks my ass in racing and give it my blessing. Not that you need it because you’re your own person, but still.”

Mark sucked his tears back in and managed a laugh.

He’d mostly put himself back together when there was a sharp tap on Yukhei’s windshield. He looked up to see Jungwoo, helmet nowhere in sight, looking apprehensive but determined. Mark gestured at Yukhei to roll the windows down.

“Hey,” Mark said quietly, leaning out the window to meet Jungwoo’s anxious gaze. Jungwoo took in his red eyes and tentative smile and opened his mouth to speak, but Mark reach for his hand to hold him off. Jungwoo darted a concerned glance at Yukhei, but Yukhei just gave him a shy wave.

“Everything all right?” Jungwoo asked.

“Yeah, everything is good,” Mark grinned. 

Jungwoo returned his smile, leaning down to speak to him at eye level. 

“Do you want to go for a ride? With me?”

Mark turned a questioning gaze to Yukhei, who waved him off.  _ Go on _ , he mouthed.

“I would love to,” he answered, nearly tripping in his haste to get out of the car.

Jungwoo drove with one hand on the wheel and the other settled on Mark’s inner thigh. Mark was nearly dizzy with excitement, hand wrapped over his and near wiggling in his seat at finally being alone with Jungwoo in a meaningful way.

“Jungwoo?”

“Yeah?”

“This is probably a stupid question, but are we dating?”

Jungwoo turned briefly to give Mark a soft look, eyes drifting briefly to Mark’s lips.

“Do you want to be?”

“I thought that was obvious.”

“Kind of. But it’s nice to have confirmation. I want to be with you. If that’s what you want, too, then yes. We’re dating.”

“I think you lied to me,” Mark said softly. “I’m pretty sure you’re the most confident person I’ve ever met. How do you just say things like that?”

“Fake it till you make it, I guess,” Jungwoo said, interlacing their fingers. “Before I met you I was too afraid to do anything as myself. I only wore that helmet because it made me feel better about putting myself out there. Racing was all I had. The only thing that really made me feel like I was in control. Maybe you make me brave.”

“I wish I could make myself brave. I wish I could make myself do anything,” Mark complained. “I know I’ve mentioned it a few times before, but you’re the first bright thing in my life in a while. I’ve just been so stuck.”

“We can work through it together,” Jungwoo said. “We have all the time you need.”

“You know, that first day you sat down to study with me, I went home and filled like ten pages of my notebook with song lyrics,” he said, staring down at their interlaced fingers. “I was so embarrassed I had to lock it in the bottom drawer of my desk. I haven’t done anything like that since middle school.”

“That’s adorable,” Jungwoo laughed. “I’m glad I gave you inspiration.”

“Me too. It was the first time in a long time I felt like I didn’t make a mistake majoring in what I love.”

“I felt something like that the first time I raced. My father was a mechanic before he retired. He let me learn to drive when I was really young and taught me how to work on cars, too. But he always wanted me to do something more stable with my life, so here I am majoring in nursing. It’s not my passion, but I hope it’ll give me the stability to do what I love. There’s nothing like being behind the wheel and knowing you could go on forever, just you and the road. It’s why I do most of my driving at night. Just me, the stars, and the road.”

“I wish I loved it like you do,” Mark said quietly. He watched the road streaking by out of the window, knowing Jungwoo was going far faster than the speed limit and finding that he really didn’t mind. “Honestly, the few times I’ve gone with Yukhei have been mostly terrifying.”

“Oh, it’s always terrifying, especially when you’re the one driving,” Jungwoo admitted. “But there’s something powerful about it, too. I’ve been driving since I was so young, it’s one of the only things I’m good at. The chances of me making a mistake are so low, my anxiety doesn’t bother me nearly as much.”

“It’s the opposite for me, I think. I get so caught up with music being the one thing I love the most that I can’t even imagine doing it without putting everything I have into it. If even once I didn’t put my all into a composition or an assignment I think I would feel like a failure. Like I’ve been lying to myself. And hey,” Mark frowned, squeezing his hand. “I heard you say driving is all you’re good at. That’s not true at all.”

“I appreciate you saying that, Mark. Thank you,” Jungwoo said with a soft quirk of a smile. “But it has to be exhausting being at one hundred percent all the time,” he continued. He snuck glances at Mark as he drove, the shine of moonlight in his eyes. The outline of his face in the dark, turned towards Mark with so much care and attention, was almost too much for Mark’s poor heart to take. 

“Yeah,” Mark said, his voice small. “Yeah, it kind of is. But doing things like this? Being here, with you now? That makes me feel better. You make me feel better.”

“You make me feel better, too.”

Mark felt the car begin to decelerate, and realized they had pulled onto a side-street with a line of apartment buildings. Jungwoo slowed to a crawl and turned to look at Mark fully.

“My apartment is just down the road here,” he said quietly. “If you want. If it’s not too early, or too much. Do you want to come in?”

Mark hoped it was too dark in the car for Jungwoo to see how red his face was getting. He nodded silently, but Jungwoo had turned back to the road to navigate the turn into his apartment building’s parking lot and didn’t see. Mark waited until he came to a stop and put the car in park. Then, gathering up every scant bit of courage he had, Mark leaned himself over the center console and kissed Jungwoo right on the lips.

His lips were soft, and half-parted with shock at Mark’s sudden movement. But he didn’t take long to catch on. He cupped Mark’s cheek with one warm hand and pulled him in closer, kissing him back slow and deep. Mark reached up to thread a hand through his hair. They parted, breathing in and out with their foreheads pressed together, eyelashes tickling each other’s cheeks.

“I would love to come in,” Mark whispered. 

Mark was fidgeting in the passenger side of Jungwoo’s black car. It was comfortable and spacious inside, which Mark had had good reason to appreciate over the last month, but he was still nervous.

He went to bite at his thumbnail and was stopped by Jungwoo’s firm hand on his.

“Are you all right?” Jungwoo asked, pulling Mark’s hand towards his mouth to press a kiss to his knuckles. “You don’t have to ride with me if you don’t want to.”

“No, no, I do,” Mark said urgently. “I’m still keyed up about my final project, honestly.”

“It turned out great,” Jungwoo soothed. “You’re going to ace it.”

“And you’re gonna ace that chem final tomorrow,” Mark said firmly, noticing that his boyfriend had a case of the jitters too. “I know you are. You’re gonna kick its ass just like you’re gonna kick Yukhei’s tonight.”

That pulled a laugh out of him. “Wait until I tell him you’re throwing him under the bus to make me feel better.”

“Hey, you’re not the one who had to go shopping for the perfect birthday gift with his boyfriends last week. I thought Ten was gonna kill me.”

“He is a bit intense.”

“You’re telling me.”

“Ah, here we go,” Jungwoo said suddenly, tightening his hand on the wheel. His other hand let go of Mark’s to take a firm grip on the inside of his thigh. Mark took in Jungwoo’s focused look -- the furrowed brows, the sly smirk edging onto his lips -- and grinned. 

He turned to look out the passenger side window, meeting Yukhei’s gaze. He was pumping his fist as if he’d already won, shouting at their car unintelligibly. The bass in his car was so loud Mark could feel it in his stomach even from where he was sitting. Kunhang, sitting with his feet up on the dashboard in the passenger seat, sent Mark a cheery, unconcerned wave. Mark knew Ten was somewhere in the crowd of racers behind them, revving his engine as they all waited for the light to turn green.

The light flashed, and Jungwoo slammed his foot down on the accelerator. They flew forward with a screech, barely a few feet ahead with Yukhei gaining fast, and Mark knew there was nowhere else he would rather be.


End file.
